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The new Star Trek Film
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gb7648
science forum Guru


Joined: 29 Jun 2005
Posts: 606

PostPosted: Sat Mar 11, 2006 12:42 am    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

Psycho to the whole spaceship crew on the speaker:
"This is Jean-Luk speaking, bla bla bla..."

Real Jean-Luk to Warf: "He is a classic psychopath from the
20th century. Who gave him the genitor position?"

Warf: "Well sir, I did."

Warf turned into the psycho shapeshifter:
"I got you."

Jean-Luk beamed out of the room as the psycho was ready to
strike him with a knife.

Distorted Star Trek Music...
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gb7648
science forum Guru


Joined: 29 Jun 2005
Posts: 606

PostPosted: Sat Mar 11, 2006 12:19 am    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

"
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gb7648
science forum Guru


Joined: 29 Jun 2005
Posts: 606

PostPosted: Sat Mar 11, 2006 12:18 am    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

Chirp on the chest thingy.

Two voices at once: "This is Jean-Luk..."

Jean-Luk stopped and the voice continued.

"I AM BIG CHICKENSHIT. I AM JEAN-LUK PIKARD.
THIS IS A MESSAGE FOR THE WHOLE CREW.
I AM JEAN-LUK PIKARD."

13 months later the spaceship is speaking.

"I AM A BIG CHICKENSHIT. I AM THE JEAN-LUKY."
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I AM THE CAPTAIN
OF THE STARSHIP ENTERPRIZE. BWOHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
I am coming Jean-Luk. You are mine. I filled your stardate
with records you don't wanna see. Hahahahahahahahahaha.
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gb7648
science forum Guru


Joined: 29 Jun 2005
Posts: 606

PostPosted: Sat Mar 11, 2006 12:07 am    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

Distorted Star Trek music, the Starship Enterprize silently zoomed by.
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gb7648
science forum Guru


Joined: 29 Jun 2005
Posts: 606

PostPosted: Sat Mar 11, 2006 12:03 am    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

Jean-Luk was walking away from the prison cell. Inside
the spaceship genitor was yelling: "You are next Jean-Luk,
he he he he he."

Jean-Luk stood with a fear in his eyes.

"Why are you wearing russian red soccer shorts, Jean-Luk?"

The women on the hall began laughing.

Jean-Luk ran like Jim Carrey with his arms hanging
and jumped into the trash disposer head first, and slid
down to the trash container. He sat there silently.

His button on his chest chirped.

"I am the Captain."

Warf: "Captain, the genitor escaped."

Jean-Luk: "I know, he should appear down here any second.
You watch him from upstairs, while I'll keep an eye out for him,
down here. Watch out, he is a shape-shifter."
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gb6724
science forum Guru


Joined: 15 Jun 2005
Posts: 1119

PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 11:48 pm    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

The tea pot began boiling and whistling.

Jean-Luk turned back. He had Borg gadgets on his face.
He ran and broke down the door. On the hall were millions
of chicken.

He walked and sat in a shuttle and took off.

He went straight to the Borg ship. There, he sat
behind the controls and crashed it into the Enterprize.

Warf: "Are you ok, sir?"

Jean-Luk opened his eyes.

Jean-Luk: "Yes. Not a problem, Warf. Is the genitor
behind bars?"

Warf: "He is locked up, sir."

Jean-Luk: "Good. I will come and attend the ceremony."

Jean-Luk put down his flute, and left with Warf to the morg.

The dead people's coffins were released into space.
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gb6724
science forum Guru


Joined: 15 Jun 2005
Posts: 1119

PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 11:39 pm    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

Jean-Luk is sitting on a desk, legs swirled, meditating, playing the
flute.

Warf: "Are you ok, Jean-Luk?"

Jean-Luk: "What?"

Warf: "Are you ok, sir?"

Jean-Luk: "Very well, sir. I'll be joining, we had a dinner
appointment?"

Warf: "No, sir. We didn't have a dinner appointment."

Jean-Luk: "Thank you. I am fine. Carry on, Warf."

Warf: "Yes, sir."

Jean-Luk picked up his flute and played some more
while Warf left his quarters.

A cracking noise and somthing that sounded like
chicken.

Jean-Luk walked to the window. His face was pale.
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gb6724
science forum Guru


Joined: 15 Jun 2005
Posts: 1119

PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 11:35 pm    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

Jean-Luk, we found the psychopath. He is the
spaceship genitor. He murdered five of our crew-members. Should we put
him under arrest?

Jean-Luk: "Yes. Good job. Go arrest the genitor."
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gb6724
science forum Guru


Joined: 15 Jun 2005
Posts: 1119

PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 11:29 pm    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

Well, the truth is, white holes in spiral galaxy centers are real, and
the film is real, and the psycho is a real psycho obsessed with really
destroying my life, and he pulled real criminal acts on me, speaking to
me face to face using my name for 13 months, not counting his classic
psychotic web pages. He was obsessed with matters of paranoia and
terrorism. If I can't take a real crime, I must be paranoid. Some
people are very dumb.
And I am talentless. Zoom, number one, I think, I am, I am Jean-Luk
Pikard.
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gb6724
science forum Guru


Joined: 15 Jun 2005
Posts: 1119

PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 11:17 pm    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

A man without any talent thinks he invented
white holes and imagines a Star Trek film online,
the wonders why psychos are after him.
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gb6724
science forum Guru


Joined: 15 Jun 2005
Posts: 1119

PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 11:16 pm    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

The Google billionaires smile for a photo.
Millions worldwide feel insulted about privacy
violations on the Internet. Millions of writers
find their copyrighted work copied freely by Google
and financially sponsored.

Bush gives a radical speech. No, America is
not fanatic.
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gb6724
science forum Guru


Joined: 15 Jun 2005
Posts: 1119

PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 11:06 pm    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

A cyber-terrorist sits down by his computer
and begins drawing up a web page about his
cyber-victim intending to destroy his life.
He took it personal and to death. He is full
of cold feelings.

Drakula appears and rips his head off.
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gb6724
science forum Guru


Joined: 15 Jun 2005
Posts: 1119

PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 11:03 pm    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

A clearing. Its morning. A man is laying in the
grass and has a flower in his hand.

A girl walks by with a bucket. He stands
up takes her bucket happily and walks with her
to the village.

She runs. He runs as fast as he can
with the bucket.

They stop by a hill and see the ocean.
There a large sailship.

They sit and sing up a korean song.

She offers him a drink from the bucket of
milk.

They are sitting on a swing. In their lap
a bucket of milk. They are swinging.

Their faces turn young. They are 5 year
olds with two small buckets in their laps.

The wind is blowing in Siberia. Two kids
are running toward a house dressed up
in think coats and snowboots.

Mother looks out.

A couple is rowing in the river in Russia.
They are talking about moving to Siberia
where her grandmother left a house behind
for them.

They are rowing very well.
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gb6724
science forum Guru


Joined: 15 Jun 2005
Posts: 1119

PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 10:48 pm    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

A man walking in the forest in Russia, singing
the most beautiful female vocal.
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gb6724
science forum Guru


Joined: 15 Jun 2005
Posts: 1119

PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 10:41 pm    Post subject: Re: The new Star Trek Film Reply with quote

A woman dancing ballet. A man playing the piano.

Vampires enter the theater.

The ceiling collapses on the audience.
The woman continues dancing.

Drakula is in the front row, the ceiling collapsed
behind him. He watched the show.

Vampires are crawling, and climb under the
collapsed ceiling.

In the neighboring room a man is kissing the
chest of a woman. He is removing his shirt.

In another room a group of young people,
among them the man from Starship Enterprize
is listening to loud music.

Drakula is sitting silently, closes his eyes as
the man plays the piano loudly.

Trees appear, and he is flying with vampires.

The cracking ceiling crashes on the couple kissing
in the dressing room. The guys in the neigboring
room quiet the music and walk over.

The crashed ceiling in the dressing room was
moving up and down.

Drakula was not in the theater.

His seat was empty.

He was holding the hand of a woman, they
were flying toward the Moon.

Behind, three vampires sat on a tree. One
of them had an astronaut suit on.

He jumped to the floor and began undressing.

Under his suit he had red Russian soccer shorts on.

A vampire girl slapped him on the ass.

He stood on the streets of Harkov in Ukraine in
those shorts. Somewhere a day started.
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Google

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