my report for the council of aesthetic deletions

kutaman · science forum Guru Joined: 15 Jun 2005 Posts: 459

thumper
+++

little brother and his son
ave returned home

and th land rover 110
is out of th driveway

he's bought a thumper
xt 500 single four stroke

and they're about to
head up th north coast to pick it up

+++
golden earring
'radar love'
+++

last one was a kwaka
600

thumper
i had to stand on th gutter

to kick it

+++

made things ready
to pull th crap out of th shed

+++

made a path and

th young fella helped me move th bobcat

implement

+++

next door had a huge party

last night

doof music at 3 am
karma got em

tallow

th fat black b***h

knocked over one of their big pot plants

outside their garage

excited to seelittle brother home

smashed it to smithereens

he reckons it;s payback for my tail light

they were a bit slow payin

+++

kept me awake

dont f*** with th wizard

+++

paulo
my twin brother

we trapped in th same head
says he'll have me offline

today

+++

how u gunna chew up that net access black ?

+++

psychic blog has to go offline

six days out

+++

not uppin my drug dosage

to feel for

wot's coming

+++

u cn get fucked

+++

i'll be right jack

+++

once we run it out
we cant get back online and

i got a meeting with th gummint
wednesday

+++

i got enough porn paulo

we can slide offline for a month man

+++

"unicycle's waitin for ya"

cool as

+++

had a weekend off

no unicycle man

floatin thru brizzy

+++
limp bizkit
'rollin'(uncensored)
+++

f***

my gift firin on all cylinders

+++

but th psychic world is

just somethin to laugh at

on th telly

+++

if i wasnt so fuckin lethal

ppl die seven days after i

want em dead

i'd go after th pricks

but

kuta says it aint a

killin offense

didnt train to just make ppl sick

+++

"happens occasionally"
i dont ave much discretion paulo

+++

"corrollary to th hypersensitivity"
for every eaction and s**t

"th reaction is opposite"

+++

balance

+++
ween
'push th little daisies'
+++

i dunno paulo

not really about whackin ppl

is about nipples

they say

+++

if i hadnt been a minder
on th showground

for seventeen years
maybe i;d see things different

+++

yeah ya meet my
female side first

me
jennifer

never forget
paulo still here

+++

lethal cunt

+++

that thing was a hot potato paulo

she welcome to it

<<<smile >>>

+++

no cunt'll ever read it

"keep changin yur name"

how we been on here five years

do you know about me >

+++
tori amos
'cornflake girl'
+++

i aint on th cornflakes box

+++

i stay missing

+++

this is not really happenin here - lyric

+++

yeah and

i havent really

pointed th bone of death at

a quarter of a million ppl

and killed em

one and all

+++

reality sucks

+++

it's not my job to interpret th clues

is it paulei ?

"no babe"

+++

cool

+++

"we just throw em"

+++

i'm still not comfortable with

how we predict th future

+++

"is wot it is"

+++

fill th hash pipe will ya

..
..
..

th opposites thing
doesnt explain everything we
pulled

+++
c+c music factory
'things that make you go hmmm..'
+++

"no it doesnt"

"it's magic babe"

+++

th aussies are playin their first game in th soccer tonight

"no"

paulo

"u put in a fix"

"to get em into th cup"

"they still not learnt how to deal with"

"witchdoctors"

just cause they didnt pay that guy

and safran went offshore

to find another witchdoctor to

lift his spell

yeah man

african witchdoctors
are SO
much more powerful

than our homegrown variety

ya fuckin prejudiced cunt

+++

i should send safran some

bad juju paulo

"we dont have enough discretion"

"it;d kill th cunt"

"does he deserve that ?"

+++

"he gets wot he deserves regardless"

the all ?

"yeah"

+++

water drippin from under th landy

"they washed it comin home"

"covered in mud"

thought it was water injected

"u still on that ?

+++

inject water
into a rocket motor

wot happens ?

+++
city high
'didnt ya'
+++

big boom

goes

very high

+++

synchronicity keeps

givin me positive on this paulo

+++

more sure ont his than

seven days before th last kuta beach bombing

and i was squeelin
in htis psychic blog

ah paulie

if they bomb my kuta beach again

my rleigion kuta

will i survive th

psychic wave this time

last time

dragged me over kuta

mountain

in brizzy

on my uniccyle

with no drugs

to ease th testicle pain

blue ball pain

over th

WHOLE mountain

f*** my gift i cried

+++

and seven days later you cunts

hit us again and

i got real angry and

after seven days

i asked kuta to whack ya

in this ere

psychic blog and

northern pakistan

shook like a fuckin dog

th next day

dont f*** with me

killin aussies is

lethal

"to your health"

+++

you prejudiced cunt

+++
U2
'sweetest thing'(the single mix)
+++

"more of th opposites"

how i tell th future

mostly

+++

i aint pickin th music

it just

playin randomly

i can read th signs

+++

007

is

too low a number for my talents

+++

the sweetest thing

little brother just pullin out

he gaveme a

two litre bottle of

coca cola

zero

no sugar

no cunt'll drink it

including me

+++
the black eyed peas
'third eye'
+++

if you

have a prize

for th proof of

psychic abilities

th money better be in th bank

i'm lethal

i dont use courts

+++

my third eye

u cant fool me

+++

if yur not on th up and up

top song in th list

visible at th moment

is

play dead

by bjork

withdraw yur prize if it aint

paid up

do it now

+++

no s**t

+++
the black eyed peas
'smells like funk'
+++

smells like s**t paulo

"but this is just words"

"anybody can write song titles"

i aint that clever

fill th hashpipe again man

+++

i can smell th s**t

runnin down is legs

+++

gone liquid

so fuckin frightened

+++

u'll get over it dude

or yur heart'll stop

care factor

+++

my nephew

he enquired of me

i cant see you

as bein vice president of a motorcycle club

and i realised

he hadnt met paulo

+++

showed him th tshirt and

told im some stories

th riots at th bike racing in 85

motorcycle tales

+++

even when i was
vice president

some folk couldnt believe it

+++

never seen me chair a meeting

+++

i was th wildest cunt in th club

even if i was

on a sidecar

i could still wheelie it

one wheel wheelies

+++
the black eyed peas
'sexy'
+++

my unicycle screamin at me paulo

aint been otu all weekend

my body is

"i know"

+++

i didnt dance on my unicycle

and have ppl

tryin to work out

is that a girl or a boy

+++

no i dont have tits dear

i'm sorry

i still get wet

+++

f*** she was funny

+++

too good looking and

blonde

and paulo blew er off

+++

ah man

+++

i coulda dyed her hair

+++

brisbane shitty council

fined me for

ridin a girls bike

a bicycle

last week

i'm still cut

pisseddown rain
seven days later

so i'm smilin
we in a drought

i have to have th wizard really annoyed occasionally

+++

and it makes good reading

in MY diary

for me

+++

th locals dont know i exist

+++

no-one does

+++

not publicly anyway

+++

i blew my cover paulo

+++
jebediah
'fall down'
+++

i'm sorry guys

+++

a higher power got me

rang my neck and

i spilled my guts

why they dont tell me everything
before they send me on a mission

wot i dont knnow
i cant tell

+++

they'll stick me for th tsunami wont they ?

"in time"

f***

+++

i asked for it
before

th kuta beach bombing

+++
the red hot chill peppers
'track no09'
+++

"they repeat"

+++

come back up

+++

"retro"

cum out th rear end ?

"<<<smiel >>>"

+++

y ahv to
cnvince yur brain

ya re psychic

first

har din a society where

ppl still laugh at psychic powers on th news

and then have

three tv shows in a row

all about psychic powers

+++

they'll repave kuta one day wont they ?

"yeah"

good

my psychic tag'll be removed and i can

breathe easy

+++

fuckin tv journalists are blind
"and humanity's deaf"

+++

only way to push thru man

+++

make so much

data that

they're swamped

+++

read jenny for three days and

+++

steal my idea

and call it your own and

well you know

i'll take up my old job again

+++

i could retire and

leave it to

th rest of th intelligence community

+++
pearl jam
'black'
+++

calle dme

black

as my name

for twenty odd years

here in oz

ya killed me

i dint hear my name anymore

u so scared of black

u gave me respect then

+++

i hooked up with th council
for aesthetic deletions and

they're sayin i've put in
more than my five years

i've gone
long service

unmolested

+++

and public
th whole time

f***

+++

best jape man

+++

i thought
when i whacked

christopher skase
th boys who were workin with me

would bring me in from th cold
nah

+++

ya owe me denton

+++

u were gunna send
mercenaries

i dint have to leave my bedroom

+++

died right on cue too
seven days

+++

th council
have given me permission

to write up my memoirs
in proper form

and after their perusal
give it to a

wider audience

+++

f***

+++

i'll have to call it pscience fiction of course
and change th names

+++
M/A/R/R/S/
'pump up the volume'
+++

i can pull most of th details

out of my diary

+++

"can it have th words PANIC"
"in red letters"

"i did carry a towel on th unicycle for six years"

+++

wot to call it ?

+++

"write it first"

+++

somethin to do while i'm offline

+++

how many clues do i put in
to th psychic blog

buried in th newsgroup records

"one"

+++

my pages in history

+++

why do humans keep s**t paulie ?

"sometimes still gold in it"

+++

s**t's always useful

"why they put it in perfume"

?
"more opposites"

+++

they;re gunna let me retire

+++
joel turner and the modern day poets
'these kids'
+++

i wanna go back to

growin plants

half acre of food

sustain me and mine

+++

"yeah but in space"

+++

?

+++

"i can see th future"

+++

i can see a few aussies umm

not comfortable with

our organisation's doings

"we were well secret"

+++

umm
my protection spell

on th aussie troops

in iraq

still holds

i'm freelancing for th council now

when they cant find

th other high priests of kuta to

do th business

+++

i'll fill th hashpipe this time

u been workin hard

..
..
..

little brother buyin
a property

on th table lands

we both decided a while ago

we gunna retire there

well put a base there you know

uncle genie's movin onto it and

+++

so he be close to his brother

+++
violent femmes
'i hate th tv'
+++

my brother does not hate th tv

he got two real good friends

way more overt trannies than me

takin drugs to make their boobs grow

+++

he laughed

i l;ocked myself outside

in th rain

in a sarong

slidin door is fucked man

you too big and

slam it too hard

bout a minute to go on my chops

he said he woulda gone for a ladder

my cops woulda burned

th nephew

woulda gone to th end of th shed

and got up

on th roof

to climb in a window

i wlaked ten feet

with th sawhorse and

got on th internal corner of th roof

fastest way

leats effort

straight lift
inside ninety degree corner

and walked th roof and

wheni wrote up my blog

talkin about it

th chcik in my computer

singin

rickie lee jones

sang

somehtin inth song baout

walkin upon a roof

was freaky

my chops didnt burn

scottie laughed

+++
pj harvey
'the dancer'
+++

"didnt tell him whole tale"

+++

dance across th roof
little brother a roofer

"not coppin to bein a roofer jenny?"
but that;s truth

"it;s how it"
"works"

"dont know how to incarcerate me anyway"
"cant look after my body"

"without torturing me"

"get out of jail free card"

"<<<smiel >>>"

+++

only man
in medical records

to suffer from blue balls

every day

they look after me

+++

dont give me free drugs though

+++

"wait till i get thru with them"

ok paul

+++

bugger
it was gunna play

the outsider

it aint on th disk

lost that hard drive

+++
city high
'15 will get ya 20'
+++

yur just fuckin with me god

+++

i can gamble to finance and
go underground

chameleon enough
most folk cant pick which sex

"got that wrong"

"make decision"

"and relate that way"

"dont see other one"

even with a beard man ?

"why i'm 009 dear"

+++

see tough man
muscles in poo

talk to girl

+++

"see girl"
"dance on unicycle"

"talk to man"

+++

i can even pass for a ten year old boy

+++
easy star all stars
'money'(extended)
+++

f*** th money
give me th stars

just th ability to go into

high orbit

byebye achy testicles

+++

cant cut em off
source of my power

+++

th council's only gunna

nab me occasionally

they been lettin me

go longer and longer

i dont look at th other folks work

i just see it

in th background

on th tv news

that;s one of ours

+++

we're a loose affiliation

+++
tomski
'14 hours to save the earth'
+++

we should be in a

well paid

organised group that

protects th planet from outside

it;s wot we would do inside

that bugs em

+++

th action reaction thing

+++
frank black
'superabound'
+++

<<<smiel >>>

+++

we use it to put out fires

water

and its th most

flammable substance

there is

ah man

ppl are so fuckin dumb

+++

i worked out how to
power my hippie farm and

run my core technology
cause i like my computer

and build a
decent home generating system

+++
arlo guthrie
'highway in the wind'
+++

there are two caravans in th yard

water restrictions cum in on
th nineteenth

there's plenty of work up there

they got snotted

all th banana farms got wiped

we grew up

on a banana farm

all th rooves disappeared

half th town gone and

we lived long enough in
north queensland

we can claim

we were locals

+++

th plants grew so much better
in happy rock

+++
machine gun fellatio
'pussy town'
+++

wot was that thing
that chick was masturbating with paulo ?

"u wanna ask now ?"

make sense to me

"i'm fucked if i know"

"i'm psychic"

"i'm not fuckin omnipotent"

thank you dear

+++

it woulda been a happy rock

looked like a mango

ya shoulda downloaded it

+++

"mad b***h"

+++

th mangos grow up north

"oh"

happy rock

is up north

everythin grows better

tablelands up north

and th town wot got wiped

by th cyclone

+++
the red hot chilli peppers
'track no08'
+++

hmm

came in on a

westerley track and

+++

99% of th banana crop

in australia

gone

+++

i was told

i was aloud
to kill

four innocent civilians a day
i walked out th front door and

shot three ppl in th street

i liek to live on th edge
..
..
..

james bong
009

+++
p.s.

"if they give me a watch"
"he'll drop dead a week later"

he knows wiz
he knows

+++
my drug hell
'girl at the bus stop'
+++

why thank you dear

i dont have any boobies

but boy you were fooled

i havent got a shirt on

and that six pack is

rock hard

+++

dunno if i could handle
not livin on th edge anymore

but floatin in a tincan
growin crops while i

keep my psychic gifts honed and

searchin for anything
that;s got water

+++

i ended up with
three stepdaughters

livin across th road from

th big bush

all four of you
yur mother included
are comin out into th bush

and learning how to find

water

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